At the heart of our practice areas is Building Family. We consider a family to be any group (of two or more) with a shared goal(s), principles, values, and aspirations. Our mission is to help "families" end the fight and transform their relationship so that they are keeping what is most important in front of them.
Whether it be a marriage, a divorce, or an organization, it is this principle of having a relationship that works so that the family is effective in achieving its goals. We believe that children are foremost to families of any kind. We are deeply committed to supporting families in opening up communication and cooperation so that the children can be front and center as they should be.
Marriages have difficulty when the way a couple is living is out of alignment with the commitment, promise, or covenant they made to one another in entering the marriage. Sometimes, the difficulty lies in the spoken promises to one another, and sometimes the break is in the unconscious, unspoken agreements that were made in the beginning of the marriage. Often this shows up as one person feeling like a victim, and the other an abuser. It can even be that both people are feeling abused and taking on the role of abuser. Perhaps they feel they are rescuing their children from their partner.
Transforming the Relationship
Whatever the situation, our work helps the individuals disentangle themselves from the roles of victim, abuser and rescuer so that they can resume their roles as creators in their own lives. By getting to the perceived breach in agreement and renegotiating it so that the relationship works, couples transform the relationship into something that works for their own benefits and that of their children. This may be under the same roof or separate households as they see fit.
One tool for couples is marital mediation. The purpose of marital mediation is to restore the flow of the relationship however the couple perceives that as being. Marital Mediation as we practice it is a process that creates a safe place to identify differences as well as commonality. We steadily build agreement, helping participants to release position, frustration, and anger so that they develop empathy and understanding. From this place of mutual compassion, participants decide what is next for their family.
Sometimes, one person wants to work on the relationship and finds the other unwilling or even truly toxic. They are experiencing emotional abandonment and even abuse at the hands of the other.
We have coaching programs and education programs for all financial needs to help people experiencing this particularly painful circumstance.
When the breach of the marital contract is so egregious, people turn to divorce. The best divorce is still painful, really what distinguishes a "good" divorce from a "bad" divorce is the claw marks left behind in the process. When one person is absolutely committed to divorce, resistance is futile. Our processes help you to get back in touch with what is really important while letting go of the pain anger and sadness.
Coaching is the fast track to moving forward in the divorce process. Coaching will help you know when and where to take a stand and what to let go of. This will not only feel better but will result in saving time and money in the divorce process. More important it will allow you to focus on the well-being of your family and children so that you and your children bounce back from what is often a tragically traumatic experience.
Our expertly created and tested classes will guide you through the divorce process and facilitate keeping your eye on the prize and letting go of the past. These classes are particularly effective when combined with coaching and can stand on their own as well.