Building on last week’s blog post, this week is all leaving your ego at the door and really exercising your love muscle. These are five very simple things you can do, but NOT EASY! Your mind is going to shy away again and a gain. Make a commitment to yourself to remain in these practices all week and notice first how resistant your mind is to the practice and second, how SUPER well your partner responds!
When we use words over and over they lose their meaning. Set an emotional intention whenever your communicating with your partner. Think about the feeling you want to create- Get Off of automatic because automatic means almost as much to her as it does to you.
The more unconscious/automatic we become in our relationship, the more it becomes about “ME” and nothing is a bigger turn off to a loved one than narcissism. Put “ME” on the shelf for a little while, after all what you really want is more of them : )
Once “ME” is on the shelf, we are ready to be compassionate. We work at seeing the world through their eyes, understand their wants and needs a little better and work to meet them. Try being truly on your partner’s side. No more judgement or criticism, just be there for them. Say the words “I am here for you”.
When couples have been together for awhile, it’s easy to see the negative. Remember, a negative trait starts as a positive and then is taken to the extreme. Start looking for the positive root of the negative you are perceiving. If she is always working, get that she is not only fulfilling her purpose, but also contributing. If your closet looks like chaos to him (even though it makes sense to you0 get that his sense of order is what is driving his success in other areas. Acknowledge the positive trait under the negative (annoying) one and the dynamic will change.
Give unconditionally. Find out your partner’s love language and keep their love tank filled with no thought for yourself. You will be amazed at the returns!